Perspective

After leaving you with a rather dark post for about three weeks, I am finally back. We returned from Australia on Saturday afternoon after an incredible and epic adventure.

During our first few days in Sydney, Andrew seemed slightly annoyed with how things worked. These people are crazy! or This country is ass backwards! he'd interject when he had forgotten to look right before crossing, or when I failed to tell him to order a long black instead of a black coffee, or when he realized there is no such thing as a one cent piece in Australia, or when a group of men in their mid-twenties began singing Advance Australian Fair as loud as they could on the metro.

As our trip continued, we reached the red center of Australia and spent a day hiking around Uluru, a massive rock structure that jolts out of red earth sand dunes. We thought about the Anangu people that still live in the region and how they live off of this land despite its harsh conditions. Not a cloud in the sky, not a bit of humidity, not a trickle of water, and spring temperatures of 90 degrees and even hotter in the sun.

It was humbling. It was perspective.

That perspective is what continued to grow as our adventures unfolded. I was reminded of the passion that Australians have for life, and Andrew was exposed to that passion for the first time. Slowly his These people are crazy! comments became These people know how to live! or This country is doing things right! or Why can't Americans be so excited about the simplest things in life? 

We noticed a lack of unsmiling people, a lack of overweight or unhealthy people, a lack of rude behavior, a lack of poor service in restaurants, bars, and stores, a lack of negativity, a lack of disrespect for their environment. And the more we noticed that these thing were lacking, we realized perhaps that's actually how life should be. To think of something as lacking is to think that it is not complete, but to be happy, healthy, friendly, hard working, positive, and environmentally conscious is not to lack, but to gain something in life.

Things we often save for vacation or rare occasions only were things people were doing on a daily basis. I'm not talking about things that require spending money because we tend to be tight-budgeted travelers, but I'm talking about soaking in the daily life. They were living life to the fullest in their own cities, towns, and villages. They didn't care what people thought about them if they were doing what made them happy and weren't harming anyone else.

That's perspective.

When we travel, Andrew and I often ask each other at the end of the day, What was your favorite thing about today? On Sunday, our first full day back in Baltimore, we did the normal things we usually do-- go to the coffee shop, watch football at Max's, do laundry, go to the grocery store. But we did things differently and pretended we were still on vacation. We biked to to the coffee shop and bar so that we could enjoy being outdoors as long as possible. Instead of stressing out at the grocery store like I usually do, I made a conscious choice to make it fun even if other people thought we were crazy. We decided to enjoy each aspect of the day, just like we would do on vacation.

When we sat down to eat dinner, Andrew looked up from his plate and asked, What was your favorite thing about today? I chose the bike ride in the beautiful September weather. Andrew chose a Browns victory just slightly more over the bike ride. And then we decided that from here on out, we're going to live like we're on vacation.

Dreaming of Fear of Failure

I had a dream the other night that was horrible.

Four kids broke into our house and our neighbors' house. They stole everything-- appliances, furniture, art pieces, Beauty and the Beast (aka my Mac and printer-- sob), and our house was bare. I caught the kids as they were leaving. I even remember the license plate number of their car-- 6668666. (I know what some of you might interpret in those numbers, but I don't really play that game. Maybe my subconscious does?) I tried calling 911 three times and no one answered. While calling the cops, the kids returned and began stealing all of our potted plants and even started digging up the cherry blossom tree from our huge planter out front.

via

At first, I thought this had to do with an overload of information I've been reading as of late about the surrounding neighborhoods and the spike of summer crimes that happens every year. Then in dawned on me-- it was about a whole lot more. Maybe it's my worry wart mind. I've written before about fear of failure, and I think this is what my dream was all about.

For the first time in six years, this month marks the start of my life without a regular paycheck. As I've ventured into my business full time, I've already shared some successes that I had not imagined would be possible. I've take some serious risks that have paid off. I believe in myself, but those risks were taken with the cushion of my last summer paychecks in the bank.

I have this awful underlying fear that I'll fail and that whatever I had hoped to accomplish will melt away and result in catastrophe. The irrational side of me visualizes a complete collapse-- having to sell all of our things and losing our house. You know, the whole living in a van down by the river thing. In reality, I know this won't happen. I know what I'm capable of in the pinching pennies department and if something horrible truly did happen, I'm resourceful enough that I think I'd be able to find a part time job or something.

Bottom line though? In these few short months of being self-employed, quite the opposite has been happening. I think I just need the reminder that being self-reliant doesn't always mean the end of the world. In fact, it most often rarely means that. It's quite the opposite, in fact. It means being more grounded in yourself. Now I just need to find the confidence in it all to know that my house won't end up stripped bare of all we have.

Do you have fears of failure too? How do you gain the confidence to overcome those fears?

Blogging Because I Want To

It seems that I haven't been a good blogger these days. I keep saying that, but what does that really mean anyway. I've had a lot of time to think instead and quite frankly it has brought me to the point of deciding that being a blogger doesn't have any rules. Why should I feel like I HAVE to blog? I want to blog because I want to, damn it, not because I HAVE to.

While I'm sure some of you awesome readers are probably annoyed with how infrequently and sporadically I've been posting lately, I've got news for you-- I don't care a whole lot and it feels pretty damn good! (That's probably no way to treat your readers, I suppose...oooops.) There is no reason why I should feel chained to this thing and so I've decided to do quite the opposite on many levels.

1) If I don't have anything to write about, then I just won't. I'm pretty sure you'd rather read something interesting than read something that sounds canned anyway.

2) I'm not hosting sponsors anymore. I start to feel like a washed up sell out when I have to promote others that I may not always back 100%. I'm promoting people I think are awesome on my sidebar just because I want to, and I'm eventually getting rid of the sponsor page when I have a chance to fix it from a blog design standpoint.

3) I will probably still post recipes and crap like that when I want to because I love food. So have no fear, yummy food will still show up in this space.

4) I will probably write about more stuff that is happening in my daily life and you'll probably continue to see shop updates because that's what consumes me most days.

5) It is quite possible that I may bore you. If that happens, just refer back to my burned butt post and know that as long as the weather is nice I am probably doing the same. Now, see item number 6.

6) I am writing with paper and ink again. On my roof deck. It's just how I work.

7) Ok, I think you get the point.

Either way. Today I felt like blogging because I wanted to. I figured I'd start with this because it made most sense. There will be other posts coming because I am feeling inspired again. However, I will warn that it is also quite possible this space may be quiet for a while too as I venture to other parts of the world for a few weeks. Don't worry, I think I can get myself together enough as a blogger to share about that when I return.

As for you, do you feel as though you HAVE to blog. Or do you blog only when you want to? Does hosting sponsors make you feel as icky as it makes me feel?

Courthouse Wedding

I've been a really bad blogger, but I don't really care. Sometimes the pressures of keeping up with this are more than I feel like dealing with (more on that soon, I hope!) and it's more fun to do other things instead. However, I thought that I should probably share with you all a pretty important event that just happened. This Tuesday, as in three days ago, we got married!

For me, it seems rather silly to make a big deal about it. Andrew and I have been together for about nine years, have owned a house together for three, and have lived together for six. To be honest, the only notable difference in how things are for us post wedding is the fact that we both have wedding bands. Other than that, I'm pretty sure it's safe to say we both feel the same way we did a week ago, a month ago, or even a few years ago. I would assume that's probably a good sign, right?

Either way, we had a short and sweet, ceremony at the Circuit Court of Baltimore City that included the two of us and our good friend Marshall as our witness and photographer. The ceremony itself lasted probably all but three minutes. We waited in the the marriage licensing office prior to heading to the civil marriages room longer that our ceremony took, and I'm quite fine with that!

Highlights from the day included the random congratulations we received from all sorts of people when we came out of the courthouse-- businessmen and addicts alike. Apparently no matter what situation people are currently at in their lives, they still believe in and are happy about love.

After our ceremony, we headed to Fells Point to one of our favorite pubs, Koopers, where we had a few beers and enjoyed some crab dip. Probably about five years ago, Andrew made a fake proposal when we were having dinner at Koopers and not so seriously chatting about the future. I even suggested that I should wear a twisty tie on my ring finger from that moment forward. As we enjoyed our beers, we realized that we had come full circle, sitting at Koopers yet again.

We then went home and took naps. Yup. We're awesome like that. Who doesn't want to take a late afternoon nap in a chair in the living room on their wedding day? After waking up from the nap, we just looked at each other, laughed, and said, "Now what?"

We had late dinner reservations at our favorite restaurant, Woodberry Kitchen. We dressed back up in our outfits for the day and headed out to dinner after a brief prom-like photo shoot that involved our neighbors and a whole lot of joking and laughing. Then it was off to dinner-- a two and a half hour event that involved some of the most amazing food. Naturally, the night ended with us passing out on our couch and sofa chair in the basement in a complete food coma. Now if that isn't a low-key day, then I don't know what is. And after all is said and done, I can't even fathom how anyone would even want to subject themselves to the stress of planning a bigger event than a courthouse wedding.

Camping Trip

This past Thursday was Andrew's birthday. For his birthday this year, he wanted to go camping. On Friday evening we set out to drive a couple hours out to Rocky Gap State Park near Cumberland. A two hour drive turned into three after nearly running out of gas and then aimlessly driving around in the dark trying to find the campground. And that is all you need to know. We shall never speak of such gas incident and driving around in the dark incident again.

Regardless, we arrived at our campsite around 10pm, had to set up in the dark, and proceeded to make a fire so that we could eat some food, drink a clandestine beer (alcohol is banned in the state parks, but we like to be sneaky), and then go to bed. Lilah may or may not have decided that she was going to curl up all 75 pounds of her in between my knees. Yes, that dog is amazing. And by amazing, I mean a jerk. Not really. Well, at least not most of the time.

Saturday morning involved dutch oven egg bake making and lots of delicious French press coffee. After our ridiculously huge breakfast, we set out on a five mile hike around Lake Habeeb. It was a gorgeous trail with plenty of little spots for us to stop and let Lilah swim. Hiking and swimming all day long? Lilah was on cloud nine.

After our long afternoon, we returned to our campsite for some chips and salsa and more clandestine beer. See how sneaky Andrew was being?

 And since this camping trip was only a weekend long, a lot of it revolved around food since we weren't out and about as much as we usually are on bigger trips. So for dinner, we made the most delicious chicken enchiladas ever in our dutch oven. Yum.

We woke up to rain on Sunday morning, so quickly made a pancake and bacon breakfast and then packed our things up to head back home. Despite it being a quick trip, it was great to be able to relax and not have any obligations. Phones were turned off because there was no reception anyway. House projects were put on hold. No errands needed to be run. We could do whatever we wanted to do in the moment. And the best part about today? Lilah has been passed out sleeping in the living room all day. Not a peep. :)

How was your weekend? Did you do anything adventurous?

Back to School

This is the first time in many years that I am not going back to school. Before, I was either a student or a teacher. I cannot even begin to explain how freeing it is to watch others get ready for another school year, while I know that I just simply don't have to do that. It became increasingly apparent that I was loving this little fact yesterday as I met up with two former co-workers for lunch. Seeing their stress about getting back to school made me realize just how relaxed I am and how happy I am that I'm not heading back. That being said, my mind was still a little on the topic of back to school as I had requests for back to school pencils. I just wanted to pop in briefly to show you two sets that are currently available in my shop.

While I have probably seemed to be obsessed with pencils these days, I promise that I have some other new cards in the works that will be making their way into the shop. I also promise that I'll be back tomorrow with a post that doesn't promote my shop. Stay tuned if you like seeing awesome transformations of rooms.... ;)

Vintage Kingsley Hot Foil Press

When I first introduced you to my new line of pencils, I also showed you a glimpse of the hot foil press that I purchased in order to make the pencils. Many of you asked about the machine, so I left that post with a promise of an up close look at the machine. I was able to get the machine on eBay along with all sorts of extras that came with it. I received a nearly mint condition machine that really only has one flaw it's missing its handle. I have remedied that with a screwdriver for the time being, but Andrew said he would make me a handle.

In addition to the machine, I received three sets of type, several additional typeholders, a box full of unused foil, a box full of extra spaces, some press pads (that I hope to use if I print on paper), some miscellaneous paper work for previous orders of foil and spaces, and the original envelope containing a user's guide to the machine. What is most incredible to me, is to see the dates printed on the order forms-- one dating back to July of 1959. One of the boxes is postmarked July 18, 1951. Using that information, it is clear that I have a machine that is at least 62 years old! All of this came at a fraction of the price as what most of these machines tend to be listed at for just the machine alone. I feel incredibly lucky to have gotten such an amazing deal.

This hot foil press has been super exciting to use on many levels. I have learned a new process that is really a lot of fun, hands on work. In addition, each time I use the press I feel as though I'm using a piece of history.

Do you have an vintage finds that you absolutely love?