5 Reasons Why Not to Wear Yoga Pants

Unless your job requires you to dress professionally, you are probably sitting there reading this blog post while sporting a stretchy, oh so comfy, pair of yoga pants that have seen better days. Let's be honest-- I don't blame you. Those things are probably the comfiest damn things on the face of the earth.

However, after wearing yoga pants most days for a couple of months into self-employment, I realized that it needed to end. Wearing yoga pants was quite possibly one of the worst things that I could be doing for myself, and I needed to break the habit. If you think I've totally lost my mind at this point, I'll convince you otherwise.

1. You shower. Think about it. How many times do you crawl out of bed, throw on some yoga pants, and then stumble to the kitchen to grab a cup of coffee, never to change out of those yoga pants for the rest of the day? Yup. That was me. And quite honestly, after a while I just started to feel dirty if I still hadn't taken a shower by late afternoon.

2. You feel better about yourself. If you've showered, taken the time to put on a nice outfit, and have accomplished this by 9am, then that's a win. You will feel 200% better about yourself. You won't feel like a slob. You'll feel put together and most likely have a better body image of yourself, which only leads to a better outlook for the rest of your day. It's a confidence booster.

3. You become more productive. Getting out of those yoga pants and into a nice outfit will make you feel like you're on a mission. If you can accomplish that, I guarantee you'll start your day with more motivation to accomplish your goals for the rest of the day. I have noticed that on days that I don't shower and put on real clothes by 9am, my entire day slowly becomes a complete waste. I often like to throw on a cute pair of shoes in addition to getting nicely dressed. Cute shoes always up the ante.

4. They're an incentive to work out. If you're like me, you love fashionable workout clothes just as much as any other type of clothes. Choosing a few pairs of yoga pants that you really love can be an added incentive to be active and sweat it out. If you work out, then you get to wear your yoga pants. Use them as an incentive to be active, not to lounge around the house.

5. You have more reason to shop for cute clothes. What's the point of shopping or buying fashionable items when you never wear them? Not wearing yoga pants all day makes me more excited about what I can do with my day to day wardrobe. I love being able to dress for my mood. For example, if I'm feeling like a rock star businesswoman that day, I choose a blazer and pumps. And, knowing that I'll actually be wearing the clothes I purchase makes it easier for me to justify buying them.

I've stuck my guns with the No Yoga Pants rule for a few months now and it's a game changer. Of course I indulge on the weekends and have at least one lazy day because we all deserve that. However, I've jumped ship on the yoga pants during the week. Have I convinced you yet? Are you guilty of wearing yoga pants non-stop?

Respect is a Two Way Street

As a recently married gal who has been in the same relationship for nearly ten years, I have been more aware of blog posts and articles about the subject of marriage. They fascinate me mostly because I just simply can't relate to them. Many bloggers confess to marriage being the hardest thing they have ever endured, that marriage takes hard work, and that they are so thankful to have made it as far as they have. I have been inundated with posts like these as of late, but they leave me wondering what I'm missing. I'm just not quite getting what makes marriage so difficult.

Maybe Andrew and I have it good. Maybe we're just that compatible, or we just have a knack to working well together, or respecting others, or communicating, or what have you, without even thinking about it. I not sure really what it is, but I guess I just don't see it as hard work. If you love and respect someone and that is a mutual thing, then I think it just comes easily. That is not to say that we've never had arguments about anything, but I just can't ever remember a time when I felt at my wits end over our relationship as so many others have confessed.

This weekend, after already reading a plethora of these articles on how to keep a marriage together, I happened upon another article dealing with marriage that I simply couldn't leave on the back burner. This time, my cousin had fueled the fire with a post on facebook sharing this article about 25 Ways to Communicate Respect to Your Husband. As a married male, he was posting the article in a WTF?! kind of way and even stated something to the effect of "respect is a two way street."

I was curious, so I began reading the article. As I began reading, I realized that it was a list of ways in which the woman must act only for the husband in a relationship-- to me, this was not a list of ways to maintain a healthy relationship. I got as far as number 11, "Eyes Only For Him," before I felt like I was going to lose my lunch and had to stop reading. Was this truly a woman writing this article?! And how could she possibly feel that thinking only of meeting her husbands needs and catering to his beck and call is a healthy relationship?! What about her needs? About what makes her happy? Is there no mutual respect?

While I suppose there is some small amount of merit to a few of these points if taken on a mutual level, I just couldn't get past how archaic a large majority of her points were. I was angered that she suggested that women must reciprocate whenever their husband is in the mood for sex. Outraged at the fact she believed women should dress only to please their husbands. Horrified by the many points she makes in which the wife should not speak her mind, make decisions, or question decisions made by the husband. Disgusted by her insinuation that women should be the only one responsible for a clean house and food on the table.

This is submission. 

Submission and choosing to accept that men are more powerful and mean more than the woman in a relationship. That women are less than. That women should not be honored and respected in the same way. It is antiquated thinking that I just can't wrap my head around or deem as acceptable in our modern society. Women have worked far too hard to make it to the point at which we are in the world today, and this article felt like a slap in the face, a step backward from the freedoms and equalities that have been accomplished thus far.

Power is a frightening thing. When one has a sense of power, they will most likely do things that they may otherwise not have thought to do. And when there is no longer a balance of power in a relationship and we give power to only one side, it is no longer healthy. Both sides of a relationship should be equal, and to disrupt that equality to create a system of subservience versus power, changes the way people view each other and respect each other. While, the author of the article may find that a woman should do these things to show respect, what she hasn't considered is the way in which she is disrespecting herself in return. And above all, if we don't respect ourselves, living a fulfilling life is much harder to do.

After mentioning the article to Andrew, I finally mustered the courage to finish reading it in its full length. I read the article aloud to Andrew as we drove home from our weekend grocery trip. "What is this?! What kind of man treats his wife like that or expects those things from her?!" he exclaimed. And then it hit me. Maybe that is why marriage is so easy-- because we take our relationship as a two way street. We respect each other equally, allow the other person to be who they are, and hold no impossible expectations over the other's head. And to me, that mutual respect is truly what love and relationships are all about.

Being Late, Being Too Busy, Or Being 'Cool'?

In the last few days, this article about being late, from Greg Savage on the Huffington Post blog, has made the rounds on social media almost everywhere I have looked. The question at hand as made obvious by the headline-- How did it get to be 'ok' for people to be late for everything?

Savage hits the nail on the head with something that I have noticed with growing annoyance. People showing up half an hour late for meetings, friends always running behind for a dinner meetup while I'm sitting solo at the bar waiting for them, and having to purposely schedule dinner parties to start a bit early, knowing that the guests won't arrive on time. Am I guilty of some of these things too? Absolutely, but I don't make a habit out of it, nor do I continue on without apologizing first. And, in most instances, I strive to be a few minutes early because the thought of being late induces incredibly anxieties.

While Savage discusses the routine lateness as being rude, he doesn't delve much deeper into the reasoning as to why this is a growing trend. I stopped to think about why this might be, and thought about the instances in which I was late. In the past couple years, I would say that the majority of my lateness occurred with weekend plans with the same couple that are good friends of ours. Unfortunately, and horrifyingly, the lateness always occurred with them. It had nothing to do with them as people (we love hanging out with them!), but all about the events leading up to whatever it was that we were doing with them.

via Hairbrained Schemes

I have found that in instances of recent lateness, our schedule for the day was so full of things that we thought we could (or rather Andrew thought he could) fit into one day, but in reality was just too much. I'm not one to try to fit everything in. It's too hectic and intense for the introvert in me. Andrew, on the other hand, is like a motor that doesn't stop. If he has an idea, he'll add it to the list of things to do, or start in on it because he thinks he can squeeze it in before we leave.

In our last instance of lateness, were were 45 minutes late to the aforementioned friends' house because an hour before we were supposed to leave, Andrew started waxing his car. He thought he would get it finished in an hour despite my suggestions for him to save it for another day. As we hopped into a freshly waxed car, 25 minutes after the time we were supposed to have arrived, I remember saying over and over again, "I can't believe we're going to be so late! I hate being late!"

This makes me wonder, is our lateness due to the fact that we are leading lives that are too busy? Should we be taking this lateness trend as a sign to slow down? What if we just got rid of one or two things a day in our busy schedule to be done at a later date? What if we said no sometimes instead of yes?

Thinking from the other side of the fence, I have been in the shoes of those who are waiting for late friends or colleagues. Some are apologetic and sincere, and others come racing in, smart phone in hand, and a quick "Oh my god, I am just so busy these days!" which is their sort of version of an apology.

For the latter, I think being late is cool. You're cool when you're late because it shows that you are busy. If you're busy, then you must be super duper cool because all of those people and places need you. This, I think, may be one of the greatest reasons for lateness being "ok." It is almost like common knowledge these days that the "it" people are just simply so awesome that they are always busy and because they are so awesome that makes it ok.

When did the number of activities, meetings, events, dates, and all of those wonderful things bring about a social status that makes one friend better than the other? And when did the busy lifestyle trump being on time and respecting the time of others?

via minthouse

In general, Savage's article really provoked a new idea of living a happy lifestyle. It made me embrace the fact that I like slowing down, and that in a society where we stress to live every day to the fullest, maybe we have gotten carried away by our daily lives a little too much. When I think about my day to day life, I'd rather spend an hour at lunch with a friend, arriving on time, rather than dealing with the stress of trying to cram one more thing in beforehand, in hopes that I'll save time later. The reality is, slowing down and taking a breather just might make us all a little happier, especially if that means being on time becomes the new cool.

How do you feel about people being late? What are your reasons for being late? Do you think we should all slow down too?

Perspective

After leaving you with a rather dark post for about three weeks, I am finally back. We returned from Australia on Saturday afternoon after an incredible and epic adventure.

During our first few days in Sydney, Andrew seemed slightly annoyed with how things worked. These people are crazy! or This country is ass backwards! he'd interject when he had forgotten to look right before crossing, or when I failed to tell him to order a long black instead of a black coffee, or when he realized there is no such thing as a one cent piece in Australia, or when a group of men in their mid-twenties began singing Advance Australian Fair as loud as they could on the metro.

As our trip continued, we reached the red center of Australia and spent a day hiking around Uluru, a massive rock structure that jolts out of red earth sand dunes. We thought about the Anangu people that still live in the region and how they live off of this land despite its harsh conditions. Not a cloud in the sky, not a bit of humidity, not a trickle of water, and spring temperatures of 90 degrees and even hotter in the sun.

It was humbling. It was perspective.

That perspective is what continued to grow as our adventures unfolded. I was reminded of the passion that Australians have for life, and Andrew was exposed to that passion for the first time. Slowly his These people are crazy! comments became These people know how to live! or This country is doing things right! or Why can't Americans be so excited about the simplest things in life? 

We noticed a lack of unsmiling people, a lack of overweight or unhealthy people, a lack of rude behavior, a lack of poor service in restaurants, bars, and stores, a lack of negativity, a lack of disrespect for their environment. And the more we noticed that these thing were lacking, we realized perhaps that's actually how life should be. To think of something as lacking is to think that it is not complete, but to be happy, healthy, friendly, hard working, positive, and environmentally conscious is not to lack, but to gain something in life.

Things we often save for vacation or rare occasions only were things people were doing on a daily basis. I'm not talking about things that require spending money because we tend to be tight-budgeted travelers, but I'm talking about soaking in the daily life. They were living life to the fullest in their own cities, towns, and villages. They didn't care what people thought about them if they were doing what made them happy and weren't harming anyone else.

That's perspective.

When we travel, Andrew and I often ask each other at the end of the day, What was your favorite thing about today? On Sunday, our first full day back in Baltimore, we did the normal things we usually do-- go to the coffee shop, watch football at Max's, do laundry, go to the grocery store. But we did things differently and pretended we were still on vacation. We biked to to the coffee shop and bar so that we could enjoy being outdoors as long as possible. Instead of stressing out at the grocery store like I usually do, I made a conscious choice to make it fun even if other people thought we were crazy. We decided to enjoy each aspect of the day, just like we would do on vacation.

When we sat down to eat dinner, Andrew looked up from his plate and asked, What was your favorite thing about today? I chose the bike ride in the beautiful September weather. Andrew chose a Browns victory just slightly more over the bike ride. And then we decided that from here on out, we're going to live like we're on vacation.

Courthouse Wedding

I've been a really bad blogger, but I don't really care. Sometimes the pressures of keeping up with this are more than I feel like dealing with (more on that soon, I hope!) and it's more fun to do other things instead. However, I thought that I should probably share with you all a pretty important event that just happened. This Tuesday, as in three days ago, we got married!

For me, it seems rather silly to make a big deal about it. Andrew and I have been together for about nine years, have owned a house together for three, and have lived together for six. To be honest, the only notable difference in how things are for us post wedding is the fact that we both have wedding bands. Other than that, I'm pretty sure it's safe to say we both feel the same way we did a week ago, a month ago, or even a few years ago. I would assume that's probably a good sign, right?

Either way, we had a short and sweet, ceremony at the Circuit Court of Baltimore City that included the two of us and our good friend Marshall as our witness and photographer. The ceremony itself lasted probably all but three minutes. We waited in the the marriage licensing office prior to heading to the civil marriages room longer that our ceremony took, and I'm quite fine with that!

Highlights from the day included the random congratulations we received from all sorts of people when we came out of the courthouse-- businessmen and addicts alike. Apparently no matter what situation people are currently at in their lives, they still believe in and are happy about love.

After our ceremony, we headed to Fells Point to one of our favorite pubs, Koopers, where we had a few beers and enjoyed some crab dip. Probably about five years ago, Andrew made a fake proposal when we were having dinner at Koopers and not so seriously chatting about the future. I even suggested that I should wear a twisty tie on my ring finger from that moment forward. As we enjoyed our beers, we realized that we had come full circle, sitting at Koopers yet again.

We then went home and took naps. Yup. We're awesome like that. Who doesn't want to take a late afternoon nap in a chair in the living room on their wedding day? After waking up from the nap, we just looked at each other, laughed, and said, "Now what?"

We had late dinner reservations at our favorite restaurant, Woodberry Kitchen. We dressed back up in our outfits for the day and headed out to dinner after a brief prom-like photo shoot that involved our neighbors and a whole lot of joking and laughing. Then it was off to dinner-- a two and a half hour event that involved some of the most amazing food. Naturally, the night ended with us passing out on our couch and sofa chair in the basement in a complete food coma. Now if that isn't a low-key day, then I don't know what is. And after all is said and done, I can't even fathom how anyone would even want to subject themselves to the stress of planning a bigger event than a courthouse wedding.

Living

I've written before about how teaching had drained me. I felt like I was so stressed out I wasn't living life anymore. I had no spare time and I turned down so many opportunities because I knew they would overwhelm me more than I already was. After finishing the school year in June and knowing that I was not returning, I felt as though a weight had been lifted off of my shoulders.

Transitioning from the mindset of having a summer off and to realizing that this is not a permanent vacation is something that I've often worried about. I need constant reminders. Andrew is good about that. He treats my days like they are work days and checks in with me at the end of the day-- How was work today? What did you get accomplished? How were sales today? Did you get any new wholesale leads? Then there are the reminders of the non-work stuff. Like the, don't worry about getting that done tonight. You have all day tomorrow to do that. And I actually get to live in the moment.

This past weekend, my best friend from college came to Baltimore to visit with some friends that had invited her down from Hoboken. She had all day Friday free while they were at work, so I spent the afternoon with her at an amazing restaurant on the water sipping fantastic cocktails because I could and because I felt like it. I had worked like crazy that morning and could do whatever I wanted for the whole afternoon. Later that evening, Andrew and I went to Merriweather to see the Lumineers. We took a picnic for dinner and sat on a blanket and I worried about nothing because I didn't have to.

Saturday ended up being a relaxing day. We went to pick up our wedding rings (woot woot!) and then later that evening biked to the Orioles game. We have been biking as much as possible to get to places within the city now that I have a bike that I actually enjoy riding. However, I've been apprehensive. I'm not daring like Andrew who rides his bike every day to work, zipping between cars and narrowly missing (and once hitting) opening car doors while traveling full steam ahead. In fact, merely a few moments before we left via bike, I tried talking him into taking the car instead. I wasn't ready to bike across the city yet, I argued. It scared me.

After the Orioles game, we hopped back on our bikes to ride home via the bike path and the safest route possible that I had made Andrew promise to take. As we were trying to work our way through the crowds of pedestrians that were clogging the bike path on Pratt Street, I decided that I needed to do something to avoid the jammed path. I spotted an opening in the heavy Pratt Street traffic and I went for it. I sped down the street on my bike at full speed, passing people on the sidewalks and keeping up with cars in the street. And in that moment it hit me. I was free and I finally felt like I was living again.

via lomokev

As I turned off of the busy downtown street back to our quiet residential route, Andrew caught up with me on his bike and yelled, "You did it! I wasn't expecting that at all, but you just did it!" And you know what, as silly as it may seem, I felt like a whole new person with a whole new lease on life. Maybe it's a metaphor for bigger things-- knowing that taking a giant leap into a new adventure will be ok. Or that things that may feel scary are actually not as a big of a deal as they seem. Either way, that bike ride was just what I needed.

Summer Solstice

On this first day of summer, I can truly say that it feels as though the season has arrived. The menu sitting on our kitchen counter for this week's meal consisted of mostly grilled dishes. The flowers in our patio have grown from small sprouts to lush blooms. Summer cocktails or an evening beer have replaced glasses of red wine. And Lilah has assumed her favorite position atop the stairs leading from our deck to the patio.

Our summer evenings are our favorite. Dinners eaten on the patio. Baseball games listened to on our roof deck with a refreshing beer in hand. And maybe a bowl of ice cream for dessert. Not a whole lot needs to be done or said, but relaxing and enjoying the moment takes presidence instead.

The Story of My Life in 250 Words

This is probably supposed to be difficult. You know, writing about your life in 250 words. Mine's not so bad. My life hasn't been grand or fabulous. It hasn't always been easy-going either. But it has been a pretty awesome life.

I grew up in small-town Goshen, Indiana with my mom, dad, and sister. After years of the same school system, with the same people, and a city I didn't really like, I decided to apply to Syracuse University. If I got in, I'd attend. If I didn't, I'd work for a year and reassess. I got in.

I spent four years attending the university and one year living and working in a coffee shop in Syracuse. Four plus one is five. That last year? Andrew's fifth year of architecture school. I had met Andrew during our sophomore year. After he graduated, we found jobs. I entered a teacher residency program in Baltimore City-- what else was I supposed to do with an English major? I became a teacher and he got a job at a firm downtown. Two years later we got Lilah, our chocolate lab. Three years later, we bought a house. Three and half years later we got engaged. Four years later we got Finn, our orange tabby. And six years later? Well, that story will be soon to come....

And it will be amazing. I promise.

I know you all love teasers.

Now, was that my life story in 250 words? Yes, I think so. ;)



P.S. In case you wanted to know, this was Day 1 of Jenni's Blog Every Day in May.

How I Manage to be Superwoman

By now, if you read my blog, you have probably figured out that my day job happens to be teaching. And trust me, if I wasn't a teacher now, I'd be blogging about all the crazy shit that happens at our school on the regular. Usually, Andrew can't wait to hear what I have to say about my day. I text him throughout the day with little hints like, "Hey, remind me to tell you about the backpack incident when you get home." I know. You're all dying to know about the backpack incident at this point in time, and trust me, it is pretty much insane. However, for now, I'll have to save that story for later when I'm not longer teaching.

Most of you also know that I own my small business making cards and stationery. This small business has become my night job. I've had a lot of people ask me exactly how I'm able to get all of this done and quite frankly, I'm not really sure how I do it. I recently had a friend tell me that I must be superwoman. So, I decided to document one of my days just so I could realize how much I do every day. I mean obviously, I need to shove that in my face since I'm not overwhelmed or anything like that. Ever. Nope, not at all.

I have to start my day with coffee. 1) I like coffee. And by like, I mean love. 2) Coffee not only tastes good, but it keeps me awake. 3) I wish there was a such thing as a coffee IV. But then I guess I wouldn't be able to taste its delicious taste.

So, yeah. Boom. 8:00am. Coffee.

8:25am. Grab my orders from the night before to drop in the blue box around the corner.

8:30am. Get in the car and make the 6 minute drive to school. Yes. 6 minutes. I love it. When we bought our house, it cut my drive to school in half. I am obsessed. Be jealous.

8:45am. After heading to the main office to sign in, stopping to chat with the janitor for a few, and stumbling through a crowd of kids that I am not awake enough to deal with yet, I arrive at my room.

8:50am. I start working on last minute prep for the day. Thankfully, I have a planning period first thing in the morning. I finish typing up some notes for my U.S. History class and copy a political cartoon for a primary source analysis activity.

9:15am. I start grading U.S. History tests from the day before. Lots and lots and lots and lots and lots of essays.

9:45am. I have to pick my 7th graders up from gym class. Who thought it was a good idea to put a bunch of stinky teenagers in a gym class first thing in the morning and then ship their sweaty bodies to my room immediately after? I don't know, but I can think of many things I'd rather do that deal with that stench. Just sayin'.

9:50am-11:15am. I teach. Seventh grade geography.

11:20am. I've finished dropping my students off a lunch and head to the bathroom (I spared you the photo), quickly check my email, and finish screening a section of The Last of the Mohicans that I'll be using for my 8th grade U.S. History class after lunch.

11:40am. I pick my students up from lunch and I teach for 3 hours and 15 minutes straight. No break. Three classes. One seventh grade geography and two U.S. History classes. Today in U.S. History we're analyzing clips of The Last of the Mohicans in connection to what I'm teaching about the French and Indian War.

3:00pm. Planning period number two of the day. This day is different since it's the Thursday before we headed to Syracuse for our long weekend. I need to finish making sub plans for Friday. I have to make copies, staple a bunch of stuff, and then I keep working on more of that grading. I also finish my lesson plans for Monday. Planning periods = working like mad as if I'm trying to survive something insane.

4:45pm. I finally get home. Lilah wants to go outside.

4:46pm. Finn follows me around everywhere and wants cuddles.

4:49pm. I'm starved. I didn't have enough time during our 25 minute lunch to eat. That's most days. I've still not gotten used to it and I hate that there's not enough time to eat during my lunch. Leftover pizza it is.

5:03pm. I scarf down the pizza and head up to my studio to start getting work done, but I decide to catch up on a few blogs first instead. I have less work to do tonight since it I left my school work at school for the long weekend so I decide to enjoy a little blog reading.

5:26pm. I finally decide to change out of my work clothes into something more comfortable.

5:33pm. I'm still hungry. I make some coffee and get some mixed nuts to snack on.

5:46pm. It's time to start writing my blog post for the day.

6:15pm. Andrew gets home. He goes on a walk with Lilah while I finish blogging. At this point, I forgot to keep taking my photos. 

After Andrew gets home, we cook and eat. Dinner is usually ready around 8. We like to eat late and always have. It's time for us to catch up and I look forward to this every day. At around 8:30, I start in on my card orders and I work until I am done. Sometimes that's only an hour with an hour to spare to relax on the couch before bed or a bit of time to design instead. Sometimes that means until 1 or 2 in the morning. On days when I haven't been able to get as much grading done at school as I'd like to, my schedule gets adjusted and I might have to kick blogging to the curb in order to get everything done.

And that, my friends is my sort of typical day. And then I go to sleep and wake up. And do it all over again. That is how I manage to be superwoman.

Phew. I'm tired.